Thank God For Finals!
Let me just state, in a very calm manner, just as I have been doing for the last few weeks, how happy I am about finals. I have been a fan of finals since freshman year of high school. The way the teachers completely loosen up and the class comes together to celebrate their perfection when it comes to test taking is really quite inspirational. I remember one year, the Calculus class was so beloved that they all got automatic As. Not that they needed them- that test is traditionally super easy. As long as you are somewhat confident you know what concavity, cylindrical shells, and simple harmonic motion means, you’re set.
Since most people don’t play sports or bother to engage in extra curricular activities, we have this excess of time to study too. I mean, I study from sun up to sun down, and the in-room dining service delivers my macaroni n cheese promptly every night at 7pm. I listen gratefully to the sound of myself chewing because the halls are the quietest they’ll ever be. So say it with me, “Thank God for Finals!”
Haven’t you been waiting for just the right moment to showcase your skills and prove to your teacher that you totally listen in the last row of lecture for the 23 minutes that you’re actually there? Or maybe you wanted to prove to your science teacher that you’re not an english major by writing a terrible essay. Or prove you’re a psychology major to your chemistry teacher by over analyzing her choice of questions, which were obviously selected just for you and your imminent demise. Or maybe you’re an engineer in rhetoric, and a bit confused about why you’re talking about the bridge. Shouldn’t you be building the bridge? (I am obviously not an engineer).
The point being, Finals is the one time in our lives when we get to really express ourselves, as individuals, and finally prove to the world that we are more than just a test score. We are also GPAs and attendance records. Don’t let this moment pass you, it comes but twice a year for every year of college you decide to take. You deserve to experience every one.
So get out there and take those finals!