Taylor

Alright. So classes have officially been back in session for two weeks now. As the weather worsens, the state of pedestrian traffic on the sidewalks becomes increasingly more alarming. It occurred to me that maybe we just aren’t aware of the Pedestrian Traffic Laws. So let’s go over them.

1. Keep Pace

Please don’t be one of those people who’s traveling at half a mile an hour and makes no attempt to speed up when the people trapped behind you start sighing.  You’ve most likely dealt with winter before and you are going to have to take a chance and pick up your feet.  I mean, we want you to be safe, but some of us are actually in a hurry.

But please don’t be one of those people who sighs really loud behind people who are walking slowly in front of you either. I’ve already taken two spills myself, so I can understand why people may be a little hesitant to pick up their feet this week. Especially if they’re going down that hill at the back of Hillcrest or crossing the bridges.  I know you’re in a hurry, but safety first.

2. Stop texting. Right now.

If you are one of those people who tends to travel considerably long distances with your head in your phone, and have a tendency to block the flow of traffic or run into people, then please wait until you’re at your destination to text. The sidewalks are narrow enough as it is with the snow pileup. It’s not cool that we have to circumnavigate around you.

And when you’re searching yourself through the snow gear to figure out where exactly it was that you placed your phone, your arms are flailing all over the place. Innocent bystanders are being mercilessly beaten by your need for communication. Especially on the cambus (the free on campus buses). There’s nothing scarier than watching someone make the choice to text over holding on to the standing rails.

3. Like Driving a Car

You know which side of the road a car belongs on, right? Awesome! It’s the same thing with a sidewalk. Keep right, and make wide left turns to avoid traffic. There should be at least 4 inches between you and the person in front of you. This way we can all travel easily. And no motorcycle swerving. I’m serious. It only makes people bump into each other.

And traffic Lights. There for you too. It seems like more and more jay walking is going on lately. And the cars are not happy about it.  Sometimes you just have to wait that extra minute for the walk sign. It’s okay. DO a dance, sing a song, strike up a conversation with the person next to you.

4. Don’t Be A Road Block

And I’m especially talking to the ladies on this one. That’s right girls! I’m calling you out! You can not stop in the middle of a walkway and have a full conversation. You have to peel off to the side. It’s just rude. And sometimes you might have to separate from your friends on the bus.  But you can’t refuse to move to the back and make people getting on squeeze by you.  Also rude.

5. Epic Stair (and sometimes Hill) Moments

• A group coming up the stairs in a line so that you can’t go down.
• A group going down the stairs in a line so that you can’t go up.
• A group that has stopped halfway up the stairs so that no one can go anywhere.
• A group conversing faster than they’re walking so that everyone is waiting on them.
• A group that congregates right at the end of the stairs so that we have to form two single file lines to get around them.

If you are a member of one of these groups you better quit it.  UIowa is built on the hill and stair travel system.  These blockades are extremely frustrating.  Especially for those of us who are still walking to class.

SO if you follow these simple rules you will survive not only here, but in every pedestrian walking area in the world.  I know you guys can do it. On Iowa! Go Hawks!

This entry was posted on Friday, February 1st, 2013 at 12:13 pm and is filed under Campus Life, General, and tagged with walking, winter. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a comment, or trackback from your own site.